Hot Dog Night
An important announcement
Thank you baseball fans, big and small, for joining us at beeaaaauuutiful CORPRICORP stadium. Welcome to Hot Dog Night with yooooour Bobtown Blobfish!
Before we begin tonight’s game, the Bobtown Bobfish have a very important announcement. Please listen carefully.
We’ve received some important news about the hot dogs.
About 50 of the free hot dogs are deadly. We don’t know which ones. 50 is an approximate number. It could be up to 250.
About 500 percent of the hot dogs will sicken the eater enough to require hospitalization, sometimes up to a month or longer.
The rest of you who choose to eat a hot dog may or may not experience any or all of the following symptoms:
Fever or chills, cough, shortness of breath or difficulty breathing, fatigue, muscle or body aches, headache, new loss of taste or smell, sore throat, congestion or runny nose, nausea or vomiting, or diarrhea. These symptoms may be severe and last for days, weeks, months, or years. There may be lasting organ damage even if you have no symptoms. We are bound to report at this time that we saw a tweet about the hot dogs causing impotence, but that claim has not been studied by the Bobtown Blobfish health team.
The Bobtown Blobfish encourage attendees to make their own decisions about the hot dogs, and will continue to offer them for free on Hot Dog Night at the attendee’s discretion. By eating the free hot dog, you absolve the Bobtown Blobfish, CORPRICORP Stadium Hospitality, and their parent companies of all responsibility and liability.
Thank you for your attention.
Folks, it IS Hot Dog Night, and the hot dogs are free, so grab your mustard and ketchup! Let’s plaaaaaaaaay ball!!!
